


What you lost.

by Geekygirl669



Series: 9-1-1 One-shots [9]
Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: M/M, Mpreg, Mpreg Eddie Diaz, Past Character Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-09
Updated: 2020-05-09
Packaged: 2021-03-03 04:41:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,082
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24089053
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Geekygirl669/pseuds/Geekygirl669
Summary: Eddie and Chris talk on the anniversary of Shannon's death.
Relationships: Evan “Buck” Buckley/Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV)
Series: 9-1-1 One-shots [9]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2166678
Comments: 2
Kudos: 60





	What you lost.

“You okay?” Buck asked Eddie as he walked into their room slowly. 

“Yeah.” Eddie nodded slowly, but Buck could tell from his husband’s tone of voice that he didn’t mean it.

“Chris didn’t mean what he said.” Buck slowly sat down on the edge of their bed. “He’s mad and upset.”

“I know he is.” Eddie nodded looking up at Buck. “It just hurt, a lot.”

“I know it did.” Buck placed his hand slowly on Eddie’s shoulder smiling a little when Eddie didn’t shake it off. “I know there’s a part of you that will always love Shannon. She gave you Chris how could their not be. And one day Chris will get that.”

“He thinks I don’t care.” Eddie looked back down at were his hands were rested on his seven month baby bump. “He thinks that I don’t love her.”

“He misses her, he misses his mum.” Buck pointed out as he tried to get Eddie to look up at him. “He doesn’t mean what he said.”

“I love you.” Eddie finally let Buck lift his head up so that they were looking at each other. “I love you so much, but there is a part of me that still loves her. And there’s still a part of me that misses her, I know that even if she lived we weren’t going to work out but being divorced is different to her being dead. I just can’t show it how he wants me to.”

“And he will understand that someday.” Buck promised as a tear slipped down Eddie’s cheek. “One day he will be old enough to understand. And in a couple hours he will feel bad for what he said.”

“I know.” Eddie nodded knowing that Chris would feel horrible for what he had said. “I just can’t believe he would even think that.”

“Do you want me to talk to him?” Buck asked not one hundred percent sure what to do in this situation.

“No.” Eddie shock his head as he slowly pushed himself up from the bed. “I need to be the one to talk to him.”

“I’ll be right here if you need me.” Buck promised before Eddie walked out of their room and down the hall to their sons.

“Chris.” Eddie said as he softly nocked on the door.

“NO.” Chris shouted back.

“We need to talk buddy.” Eddie pointed out trying to keep his voice calm.

“I don’t want to.” Chris told his dad slightly quitter then last time.

“I know but we need to buddy.” Eddie sighed knowing this wasn’t going to be an easy conversation. “Please let me in.”

“Fine.” Chris said after a couple minutes of silence before Eddie slowly pushed his son’s door open and walked across the room to sit next to him on his bed.

“Do you really think I don’t love your mum?” Eddie asked him trying not to convey any of his hurt into his voice. 

“She’s been dead for five years today.” Chris pointed out as he pushed himself into a sitting position. “And you don’t seem sad.”

“I am buddy.” Eddie promised. “I may not show it but I do miss your mum, I probably always will.”

“Then why don’t you seem sad?” Chris asked looking up from his bed sheets.

“Chris I loved your mum so much, I had loved her for so long when she died and I will forever be great full because she gave me you and some of the best times of my lives. But me and your mum you know that things hadn’t been very good between us for a few years, and when she died I was heartbroken and I still am a little. But I try not to think about your mum on this day, I want to remember all the good moments I had with her.” Eddie tried to explain hoping that he was making sense. “There will always be a special place for your mum in my heart, but I don’t miss her like you do.”

“But you do miss her?” Chris asked.

“Yeah I do.” Eddie nodded. “And I think about your mum on her birthday and I always give her flowers on our wedding anniversary.”

“You do?” Chris asked shocked.

“I do.” Eddie nodded with a small sad smile. “I love Buck, and a part of me loves your mum. But Buck’s the only one here with us, and I try to think about your mum on the days that hold the best memories of her but other than that I try to focus on what I do have.”

“I’m sorry.” Chris mumbled after a few minutes of silence.

“What was that buddy?” Eddie asked barley having been able to hear his son and wanting to make sure he had heard right.

“I’m sorry for what I said.” Chris said a little louder.

“It’s okay buddy.” Eddie promised as he pulled his son in for a side hug. “She’s your mum and you miss her.”

“I have you and Buck though.” Chris pointed out a couple minutes later when he pulled away from the hug.

“You have both of us.” Eddie nodded. “And we don’t anywhere anytime soon.” Eddie promised him.

“Good.” Chris smiled up at Eddie.

**********************************************************************************

“I told you he would feel bad about it.” Buck told Eddie as the two of them got ready for bed later that night.

“You did.” Eddie nodded. “But I did agree with you then.”

“He seemed happier at dinner.” Buck pointed out choosing to ignore his husband as he sat down on his side of the bed.

“He did.” Eddie nodded as he also sat down on his side of the bed. “I wish he didn’t have to miss her like this.”

“So do I.” Buck nodded hating the fact that Chris had already gone through so much in his short life. “But it will get easier as he gets older.”

“Yeah.” Eddie nodded as he placed a hand on his baby bump were the baby was kicking. “Hopefully.”

The two of them laid there in a comfortable silence for a couple minutes before Buck said, “You should take him to see her grave tomorrow.” 

“You think so?” Eddie asked looking over at Buck.

“Yeah it will probably so him some good.” Buck nodded gabbing Eddie’s hand. “I love you.”

“Love you too.”

The next day Eddie took Chris to see Shannon’s grave and Buck was right it did help Chris a lot.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you liked this story and I would love to know what you thought in the comments.
> 
> I have corrected all the mistakes I could fine but if I missed any that you spotted please let me know so I can fix them.
> 
> ***********************************************************************************************************************************************************************************
> 
> I take suggestions for stories on tumbler under the username Geekygirl669.  
> I try and write all the stories suggested and I let you know whether I cant do them and for what reason.  
> I will also credit you in the notes at the beginning of the story if that's what you want.  
> so if you have any story's idea's please just let me know.


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